Daniel S. Irwin


I walk in
During a hold up
At the gas station.
The robber
Sticks his pistol
In my face.
So, I says,
“Go ahead and shoot,
He hesitates.
He figures I’m just
Another crazy guy.
“Fool, I said shoot!”
He pockets his gun
And runs out.
Failed robbery.
Kids won’t eat today.
I’m called brave
By some and stupid
By others.
Actually, it’s neither.
I’ve been so depressed
That I’m ready to
End it all.
I’m just too pussy
To do it myself.


Count Me In

I’m pretty stiff in the mornings.
Sleepin’ on the ground ain’t
As comfortable as it used to be.
Maybe it never was.  Bones ache.
Still, I like that crisp morning air
And that first cup of killer coffee.
I miss my old horse but this here
Youngster will do with some trainin’.
Getting’ too old for this but I always
Wanted just to be a cowboy.  Never
Made my fortune but earned enough

To get by, to get my gear, to party some.
Most of my compadres are planted
Six foot under now.  Guess there’s
Still room for me when the time comes.
Could have found me a woman to keep
But this life makes that hard ‘cause
There’s always one more round up
And you can always count me in.

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