Epiphany

Jesus had me brainwashed
Buddha was kneeling on my throat
and Rumi had me tongue tied

The weight of all the wisdom of history
sat on my chest

crushed my confidence
left me dumbfounded
feeling claustrophobic

I was sick to my stomach

accosted by poets and mystics 
inside agitators
fashionistas
flying monkeys
and beautiful people
while literary luminaries and 
classically trained bullshitters
spoon fed me pablum

and to top it all off
there was Bukowski
pissing on my lawn
with all those other pricks

No one would relieve me 
from my burden of anxiety

Well, there you have it

I walked out of church and went home

declared war on 10,000 things

stood in front of a mirror 
and heard the voice of God say—

“You moron!”