Beam Me Up Scotty It's really weird, I decided to treat myself today, so I bought myself a bottle of Jim Beam. I'm about three quarters of the way down it, but I feel kind of strangely sober. Until I try to stand up, then it feels like someone has stolen my legs. They just won't work, I'm all over the place, staggering and stumbling, and bouncing off the walls. It's really strange, if I'm that pissed then I really should know about it. It's weird how different drinks produce different effects, you would expect all alcoholic beverages to be the same. But no, my legs will bear witness to that.